Joan, Babs and Shelagh too, Zoo, Southside Center, 14.55 until the 31st Aug

I'd never been abducted before and there's not much I can say about it but I first heard about Joan, Babs and Shelagh too at CD Maxima, another Concious Theatre production.  It was laced in secrecy but did involve psychological games which left you thinking for yourself.  Blindfolded and led by a troupe of Guantanamo bay like guards, with altered white y fronts for balaclavas, we were taken around Edinburgh in blacked out vans and Taxi's, never knowing what was real or not but I'll not divulge too much.  We were sworn to secrecy, ( I don't want them to come back in the middle of the night!)  I should include that there was an instance that even the authorities were convinced by the charade.  They had attended the scene along with the chief of Police.
it wasn't far off what Robert Anton Wilson and his cronies were up too! Fnord!

It was on the way back that I'd met the director and producer of the show, gemskii, she was also doing a show in a blacked out venue in the Southside center.  I'd didn't know what I'd be seeing but I knew I'd like it.  Joan Littlewood? I'd never heard of this woman and we were encouraged from the start that this didn't matter.  And it didn't, we had a run through of her life, from her turbulent life as a illegitimate child abused by her alcoholic mother, to her wandering the streets and lanes of England until she landed, through chance, at RADA in London.  This performance was acted out in the first person, the second person, narrated by everyone involved, but somehow with only one woman.  I had judged that this would be clever but I never expected everything.  Joan Littlewood was something of a revolutionary, setting up the first ever theatre union and travelling Europe during the war.  Shadow puppet dancing was included to describe her relationship with Ewan MacColl and there was an awesome impersonation of Barbara Windsor.  Even this was fascinating and her character explained how even though this woman, Joan, was a 'bitch' she liked working for her, the character study was pretty amazing and the fact that it was complemented by a massive wig made it funny. The show had been more serious up to this point and it demonstrated the many talents of gemskii.  I knew little about Bab's either apart from the Carry On movies and her work on the BBC's Eastenders.  It was nice to sit here and learn more of her and her past.  This show really had everything and was run at the last minuet by one woman.  You can see that she has grit and determination, something she probably had before but is something we can all learn from the story of Joan Littlewood. I loved this show you can buy tickets here.

Mark Thomas at Edinburgh Fringe 2015

I’d spent the past two weeks working my way into gigs for free and I was pretty worried that Mark Thomas was going to be one of the more tricky additions.  Having been axed from my unpaid position at DIY festival blog 'the mumble' I figured that I'd be hitting the free fringe train if I was going to be practicing my brand of journalism.  Mark was doing a free talk at Word Power Books in Newington so I headed over there to a crammed room.  Its events like this that let you know who the good guys are.  Aye, Marks selling books right enough but he's always had an unprecedented drive toward making change in the world while he's at it.  Doing free things like this is one way of proving this, especially when your main gig is selling out on every occasion.

Mark Thomas at Word Power Books

Thomas isn't your regular stereotypical ‘A’ wearing anarchist, he disguises the word in a sea of political knowledge that many people don't associate with it.  He describes some of his associates and one of them happens to be with potential Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn who he had just been photographed with along with fellow comedian Mark Steel.  At this event, in this tiny but brilliantly stocked book shop, Mark talks of his excitement generated by the recent Scottish Referendum and the even more recent Labour leadership race.  Being an anarchist he reaches out to those things he perceives as having the highest likely hood of social change, veering away from capitalism, and it is interesting that Corbyn has latched on to such comedians while at the Edinburgh fringe. After years of Tory liar Labour, Corbyn is a breath of fresh air.  Although he is entrenched in the Labour Party he seeks the approval of those who appreciate Marks words.  One perfect, unpremeditated and wordy response in how Thomas perceived the referendum was 'it wasn't about tracing your ancestors back to the peaty soil of Skye,' and it's true for us Scots it wasn't about that, why would it be.  In fact his words included 'absolutely fantastic' and that's coming from a London centric.

Mark lists his influences as comedians such as Dave Allen, Alexie Sayle and Peter Cook.  Punk rock music, particularly Crass and the Fluxus art movement of the 1960's.  All of these being political in nature it becomes obvious that this humorous and artistic view into world of politics had begun at an early age.  He professes that it was Dave Allen that taught him what apartheid was when he had appeared on television.  He'd asked his own Dad what is was all about but I know how hard it was directing such questions to an adult in the eighties, far less in the 70's!  T.V., for all its flaws, finds its way to be a teacher.  Mark uses this as an opportunity to introduce his book, 'As used on the Famous Nelson Mandela,'(2007) the gritty and frightening world of the arms trade.  He then introduces 'The People's Manifesto,' (2010) which brims over with hilarious ideas for new political policies coming directly from his audiences.  At this stage we see a transformation in the style of performance and data collection.  It turns into being more about getting people to think for themselves instead of going out into a dangerous world to gather it, and it’s funny, really funny.  That's what is so great about Marks kind of humour and all this has to stem from his political beliefs.  He is taking these ideas and putting them in books, he doesn't profess them to be his own however.  He admitted to me that he was vain the other day, as in he reads all his own tweets.  A truly vain person would have kept all those ideas for his own, but he is happier laughing and being part of the group.  Names of places and people reeled out so that the credit becomes shared.  This lack of self-centeredness was in evidence at his show at the fringe last year.  Even after being betrayed by a friend, who was working undercover to infiltrate his group, vengeance didn't overcome him.  Exposing the system that created the problem became the issue.   This is true even in his writing, just as much as he likes to take centre stage it's always about a much bigger picture than just himself and I get to see this put into action again at his show, Trespass.

Mark at Tresspass +Summerhall 

 Suddenly while sitting in Edinburgh's Summerhall we are slapped back down in London.  But Mark has maps and beautiful descriptions of these places that he loves and walks around. He talks about many of my favourite things, performance art, Guerrilla Gardening, the KLF and Gonzo journalism so even though I've not spent much time in London it's not going to matter, I know where he's coming from.  He notices over time how public spaces are gradually getting stolen by gated communities and corporations, this isn't exclusive to London.  Edinburgh has its fair share of this kind of thing going on.  What better way to object to these things than by taking them back, and if you’re going to take them back then let’s do it in a ridiculous way.  The actions Mark describes take on a surreal bent, it’s a lot like what Withnail would be like if his concerns were less to do with alcohol and more to do with making the world a bit more fair and Marks Londoner accent does seem to chime along with that of stoner Danny from the movie.  We are witness to him naming his friends, people he wouldn't be without once again and although he's in the centre of it all it’s not just about him. He even names the projectionist by name and it was endearing to me that this was a mate of mine, Chris. He'd been at the door as I'd tried to sneak in and gave me a hug. I'd been a bit worried Mark would be disappointed at my lack of ability at sneaking in (the show is called Trespass after all) but I'd have to admit the girl collecting tickets was just way to on it for any Jedi mind tricks this time round.  

 He describes playing a game of cat and mouse at The Royal Bank of Scotland headquarters in London and really winds the door staff there up.  Walking around a restricted triangle of asphalt instead of on it, and getting his friends to join in at a later date.  He heads to Oxford where the council plans to ban buskers from the most central part of the city.  He draws with chalk round said line capturing the attention of city officials before heading into town where 'I must not write with chalk on the pavement' ends up being exactly what is written all over the pavement.  Not just by himself but by crowds of people, including a school from Poland whose teacher said it would be good for their English.  This is true in more than one way.  Later he dresses up as Shaun the sheep, jogging, only to get arrested but I guess this is what happens when people know you are Mark Thomas.  They know it’s bound to be a protest, even if it wasn't the intention you've been able to do so many annoying things to the establishment that they see you coming from 50 miles away.  A sad, sad state of affairs, but I guess that why these shows, or performances, can just keep on getting sillier and for Mark I'm sure he's going to take great enjoyment in all of this.  Being that he is an inventive person I can’t see it stopping anytime soon.  Like the spoon in the Matrix the law is only there to be bent in Thomas' mind and with the police as well as the NHS and fire service taking cuts they could probably all do with the help of those that oppose what’s becoming increasingly monetary based corporate law.  Mark leaves the stage dripping with sweat.  The show is testament to his passionate response to this world that we find ourselves and I couldn’t rate it more highly.

To try to work round the fringes of the law and to try to capture the imagination of others while doing so is a way to get people to participate in cultural change. By encouraging people to think differently. To show what is possible and try and demonstrate how society is failing vulnerable people in favour of the monetary benefit of a few is what Mark is telling us by producing this show.  It's a statement about how life can be a lot better by working together, by not dismissing people because of their flaws.  In a failing system sometimes laughter is the only way to deal with things.  Everyone has something valuable to give and it’s important to recognize those people who sometime give too much to their own detriment.  Mark Thomas is a perfect example of a person who has managed to strike a balance with these things and he will always be one of my hero's, thanks Mr. Thomas for being one of the good guys! 

If you've read this far Mark then I thought you might appreciate this, this is the cop I photographed last year during the fringe when we were demonstrating against the bombardment of Palestine, thought he might be a contender for the arsey pigs calendar.  Me and my cousin just ended up getting right up his nose by constantly asking for the phone number of the tattooed one behind him.  In fact I'd go as far as to say we attempted stalking him, it was very funny walking up to the vans and giving a description of him to be told that he wasn't going to be out that day.  I've no doubt he was hiding in a van some place.  Thanks so much for allowing me to review your show.  It was brilliant and restored my faith in art actions!

David Cameron sucks!

Aidan Killian Holy Trinity of the Whistleblowers @ the hive, Niddry St., 2.30

It's Sunday so I decide to go to see a man who dresses up as a cross between Jesus and Buddah. I  thought it would be a suitable replacement for a Sunday service at church.   I saw Aiden Killian last year at the Fringe, I had been stalked by his persistent advertising guy.  He'd come all the way up to our community garden at Fountainbridge and flyered on more than one occasion so I thought that level of determination deserved a look.  I wasn't surprised to learn that this new show was about whistle blowers.  Although the content had been less serious last time, his portrayal of Jesus had been more about the flipping over of the money in the temple than the sandles and bible bashing.

Aiden Killian Advertising at the Filmhouse

Banks are void from the content this time round but spirituality remains in this anti war show and Killian spins off some internal banter of him trying to meditate.  It consists of him having an argument with himself which is sweet, a surprising twist in the character of a man who likes to joke about inappropriate erections and sex dreams involving his mum who happens to be in the crowd, brave move.  My mum would flip!.

This is the third show that I've seen this fringe that involves comedians standing up for transgender folk but in this case scenario it is kind of side stepped while being mentioned as Killian is right.  Why should it matter what shoes you like to wear, be it high heels or brogues.  If you are Chelsea Manning and you have just downloaded 400,000 sensitive documents about the Iraq war and given the content to wiki leaks I'm pretty sure you've got some bigger concerns of a more pressing nature to worry about. Maybe I have a contorted view point their however being that  I've never worn a high heel in my life.

Killian breaks up taxing subject matter with twisted jokes that he follows up with penetrating intense stares into the audience, just long enough for people to visualize some depravity or another.  Its interesting that although this shows content is motivated by a fucked up world that needs sorting out Killian is completely at home exposing his own personal dark side.  This play of opposites it depicted again at the end of the show.  Killian projects footage of a child being killed by American soldiers and their obvious nonchalance about it.  The audio of the soldiers blames the parents for having brought the kid to the battle field.  It is ridiculous because its clear this place is their home, its a town, not a field with trenches or a board with dice.  Killian returns to the stage as a clown, the ultimate mask to hide from a broken world behind. Like so many clowns before him he has put himself in the firing line of dissent and is pushing others to do the same.  Bring on the Geriatric Jihad!

Miss Behave's Game Show, Where the Forest Cafe used to be, venue 322, Bristo Place, 10.15

Fuck in a window

'Good evening ladies and Gentlemen, others to the left, I phones to the right, are our instructions upon arrival at venue 322.   Stuck in the middle is Miss. Behave and her glamorous assistant Harriett who cuts about dancing to popular cheese in black leather short shorts, socks, shoes and lipstick.  He's the perfect compliment to Miss. Behave's glamour which can be quite intimidating for someone who's pretty rustic like myself. Me and my cousin (Christine, also sacked from the mumble*see other posts*) are both other's, I with my sony Z1 and her with her Samsung whatever it is.  I'm slightly miffed as they do seem to take better pictures.  Any way this show should be a test of this.  Do other phones have better cameras than the I phone....but what do you do if you don't even have a phone?  Well it would be interesting to know what that 0.00000000001% of the population would have to say about that.

Nike propoganda with Aiden Killian at the Film house  

  

I had started to notice the presence of Miss.  Behave in Edinburgh over a week or so ago.  Somebody had crudely written FUCK on the rubber factory at Fountainbridge with marker pen.  I had then spotted some cardboard box posters stuck up around town in the same style of handwriting so I began to follow the trail of badly pasted posters thinking the same person was the culprit. ( In fact shit...I'll have to go out now and take some pictures of them, its pissing down so brollys up! ....back now ...phew...) My first thoughts were that these crude cardboard scribblings were the outpourings of someone driven to the brink of schizophrenia  through an enforced believe in conspiracy theories or just the plain old simple Great British political establishment lie machine.  The posters just weren't making any sense but then Miss. Behave wouldn't have been the first person to be mistaken for being a few whips short of a basket and I should have just followed the hashtags!  Even Alice would have allowed herself that luxury!  This style of advertising is eyecatching and interesting, it may not be pretty posters but it captured my imagination and thats what good advertising does.

We got into this gig scot-free because we'd been given the password " DIRTY DANCING"by the shows balloon laden flyerer at Bristo Square, we had recognized the hash tag on the balloons.  The last time I had been to a gig in this venue was when it was still the Forest Cafe.  In hindsight I can imagine why it got relocated.  There had been BMX's bouncing about all over the place and as much as I had enjoyed it it must have been doing damage to this beautiful old building.  Miss. Behaves Game show will never do that kind of damage.  Soft items are flung around only....toilet rolls, plastic balls, cocks and dare I say it 2 minges! Yes two of them made an appearance in synchronized format in the form of the The Two Wrongies  Wrong by name wronger by nature.  And they even had proper hair but that was for four nights only, sorry if you missed it folks!

The decor is just more good old cardboard signage everywhere...this is DIY art in action and it looks great.  It's cheap and it's fashionable, the skint artists dream.  You can almost imagine you are at a t.v. show for tramps in a cardboard box.  I like it, its the kind of thing that you do when your skint and you have got to improvise!

 From the outset the crowd are going bonkers, I didn't know what to expect but the guy in front of me had practically got his tackle out already so that gave me a fairly good idea.  I guess most people are drunk by this time. Games include, who's the oldest, who's not had sex, who can tweet fastest, the recycling game.  You'd not be totally stuffed for participation if all you had was an old brick for a phone so don't let it put you off if you do... everyone here is going mad for it.  Its quite literally a non stop roller coaster ride of hysteria that hits you and there's a real sense of comradely within the  teams.  Just at the point that I get up to go buy a drink between us with the last of our change it's the who can drink a

Some impromptu dirty dancing above and me clearly winning
at downing a beer!

pint the fastest round so I'm straight on it. I'm put up against a man who's bigger than me by a long shot and he spilt most of his on the floor but I lost the point for our team as I wasn't up for lapping up what was spilt off the floor.  Yes, believe it or not I actually have standards. Our whole team could see the injustice in that and were like, 'you totally won that' and pats on the back all round.  Nobody really cared about who won after all...then it all went a bit blurry.  Miss. Behave hung around at the end to talk to us all, what a star she is and what a way to just forget everything for an hour. Wow, fun you can actually lose your self in! That doesn't come around very often.

  Miss Behave is a diva and Harriett a Queen but they are not above everyone else.  Miss Behaves taking the piss but for all her glamour she is there with us.  Even the guy who cant stop jumping up with his trousers down is spoken to in a way that respectful, it's a kind of teacher like scold and that's all the guy needs, I guess you don't mess with Miss. Behave. One poignant moment for me was when ,during  the hysteria, Garry Glitter's Leader of the Gang came on and I instinctively buried my head in my cousins armpit...I don't know what happened but I know that when I looked up Miss. Behave was shaking her head and her outstretched pointed finger in a scold, thank fuck she was messing about!  Another prime example of having standards.  You can flash as many bits around as you like, as long as your aim isn't to abuse the innocent or cause harm. The folk who do get up to that 'nonce'nse in entertainment, well, their days are definitely numbered!  This is the kind of comedy that while drawing in people with mainstream interests in  it pushes out the boundaries of what is and isn't acceptable behavior.

      Thanks Miss. Behave, for the show and the free pint.  I'll be back for a fag butt badge when I recouped my finances!

Mark Nelson-Older then Jesus, Gilded Balloon, 5th- 30th August

Having been sacked from my recent unpaid journalistic career at the mumble I sat despondently on the wall bitching about it, I have been asked back but am nae having it. We...myself and my cousin Christine (also sacked from the mumble) had just walked up the mound to witness some recognizable nostrils and to quote them here is appropriate on this occassion "I (we) smell shite!'  Yes,  they were the nostrils of comedy legend Karen Dunbar.  Not that I'm going to be talking about unfair dismissal at all!

This evening is traditionally the black Wednesday of the fringe...the punters aren't out in force so just sitting around is a good way to come by some free tickets.  Having already stumbled upon the secret pass word for Miss Behaves Quiz show I was chuffed to be given a ticket for Mark Nelson's Older than Jesus.  In the toilets, I gave said ticket to my cousin and I did the old Jedi mind trick upon entry to the gig by doing the old  nonchalant walk of I just went out for a piss, worked a treat.

    Toilets are our first subject matter as Mark informs us that the turn styles at Waverley station will be making more money than him this fringe, I am struck by an immediate  guilt beamer for sneaking in so I'm glad its dark. The shows not even expensive at three quid but I have less than that....To return the favor I offer this nugget of info. I'm aware from my recent acquisition of the police box at the West End behind Saint John,s that the toilets there are free.  Not because there meant to be but because the turn style is broken. According to my source at the w.c.'s this is because all the big bosses for the toilets are currently fighting a couple of dungaree wearing plumbers on the Costa del Sol having followed a network of sewers deep under ground in pursuit of a giant stoned turtle fucking rat named Splinter.

Being as how I had been sacked, not that I'm going to go on about it, I had no pen so decided I'd need to video the show instead.  Annoying on two levels, the first being that said video contains only the sound of my both loud and hysterical laughter.  The second, my camera ran out of memory space. All I could get my hands on was a Handy Andy and a biro...not a good combination.  The only legible writing I have says 'grand father clock baws smell em off the paper' so I'll cherish that forever, cheers Mark. I also have this picture (left) in my phone, I'm not sure what it means.

The heckels begin sharpish and its obvious that weve got a few candidates for A.A. sponsorship in the crowd.  'Your no older than Jesus, Your older than me.  I'm older than Jesus!' clearly this crowd knows their facts. Yes, white Jesus was 33 when he died.  Mark makes a mockery of his Sunday school led belief system claiming his parents dragged him there so that they could enjoy their hangovers in peace, after all this is what Sundays a traditionally known for.  My cousin and I both initially get the judders as although were no bible bashers we have long ancestry of ministers in our blood so, although not church goers, we have a certain genetic curve ball towards spirituality.  This shows really not about that though its more about how Mark observes these things personally than about how everyone else should feel about it.  He reserves taking the piss out on people on a personal level for his two year old daughter, hecklers in the crowd and a young man with a beard. Seems fair.  It is outrageous, sick and very VERY funny.  He includes clever and useful information  like if you want to get down the high street in a hurry  then hold out a poster of the story of Jesus in front of you, guaranteed to clear the deck!  Handy for occasions like being late for an appointment at the councils customer hub because your housing benefit has been stopped or your in a pure rage because of the 50th parking ticket you've been given.

  'This show is not about that' (to quote Mark) though.  I, myself have spent the my life convincing myself that even a belief in nothing is also a faith, and like the man says faith in Christianity is just a bit more grey than some of its counterparts, Hinduism, Buddhism, aliens and unicorns. You get a real sense of irritation in the way that Nelson, and this country as a whole, was conned by the pedophiles and rightly so.  Why should anyone believe any story that was told just so that some man could stick his cock in you. There is no tooth fairy, there is no Santa, there fore there must be no God and if there is one its more than likely that its a man in a disguise with his member out.  This is the way thousands of people all over Scotland and the world feel so its as well that this lads up there telling it like how it is. Those pedophiles didn't really think it through, it was just a matter of time before all those kids who were abused grew up and wanted a world they knew their kids wouldn't get the same in. We have things called comedians, like Mark, and the social media to thank for that.

We had to make a dash for it to get to Miss Behaves show so unfortunately made a break for it. I did this stupid curtsey/ bow thing at the door as I  preempted some kind of slagging for leaving early, the slagging never came but I'd already done it, it was a knee jerk response to an imagined hammer!

Go and see Mark for some both wrong and hearty, down to earth Scottish comedy.  Its a social narrative into how most of the Scots with their coupons screwed on right  feel about things.  Terrible things have happened but young peoples lives no longer continue to be destroyed by them like they did. For once I left somewhere knowing that I didn't need to watch T.V. or one single solitary film to understand this show and this is a rare thing to come by at the Fringe.  He'll also not take the piss out of you unless you ask for it....or have a beard and lets face facts, beards deserve it!

Mark Nelson picture Credit Christine Morgan    

Sarah Franken

SARAH (NEE WILL) FRANKEN: WHO KEEPS MAKING ALL THESE PEOPLE?

STAND 5 34-38 YORK PLACE  

7TH-30TH AUGUST 9PM

Sarah Franken as ISIS on the 10th of August 

Will Franken has just come out of the closet as transgender, he is now she and she is called Sarah.  She admits freely during the show that she's going straight back in the closet if the shows not a success.  A joke for sure as this is no recent development, Franken admits to having spent a period of time as a woman before, while living in San Francisco and the name comes from a girl she was inspired by as a teen.  That being said she is visibly nervous as we enter Stand 5 and she air guitars a warm up at the back of the room.  This is a function room and I admit to being pretty surprised when I was led through a warren of corridors in a posh hotel instead of the usual DIY style grime of Stand 1. There's even water running down the walls in the canopied garden!
To understand the style of performance you just have to imagine Monty Python operating with only one person and no props.  It's fast paced with words and topics linking one character to the next in a way that seems almost like a machine gun that never needs a reload.

 Sarah creates unlikely situations and characters from the outset.  Cleverly combining completely conflicting character traits and social identities.  Are ISIS members really discussing performance and lesbian relationships? No, I shouldn't have thought so, but it's a combination of well polished, convincing character accents and the absurdness of it that makes it possible to let go and the laughter roll with it.

There is a stream of lewd sexual conversation between soldiers and their Essex accented wives but these again veer to absurdity so offence, in my mind, would be difficult to achieve.  One man who loves wanking so much he wishes his wife to dress up as a massive hand, this is very much in keeping with the surreal humor of Woody Allen and indeed Allen's voice is one of the many celebrity voices we hear throughout the show.

Mental illness is dealt with, a desire to self destruct through rejection is played out.  Sarah plays on our emotions, she pretends to be in the midst of an onstage breakdown.  Sometimes we don't know whether to take it seriously or not.  Somber atmospheres being created to be suddenly diminished again by the ridiculous, bipolar is dismissed as something we used to call emotions.  For all the silliness there is always something gritty and real in the words that are used.  A portrayal of a highly exaggerated but very real impression of the way that the the health care system deals with the subject of mental health leaves you thinking, questioning. 

 Other dark matter is discussed, unexpectedly the Necronomicon makes a fleeting appearance as precursor to a ghost child in Franken's trade mark backwards devil record voice.  The real dark matter, however, is the subject of abortion.  This sketch is again absurd but completely hilarious and although I'd love to quote it, I will not spoil it for those of you that go to see the show.  It is truly something from Reanimator and my sides almost split.  The show is broken up by various news reports, at this point some of the most preposterous made up names are flung around, Scottish Fergus McJagger and London toff Sir Baron Lord Viceroy.

This show deals with a plethora of important political and social issues from a person who is ready to embrace the worlds new diverse nature and make a mockery of those who cannot accept it in the process.

As well as being a personally transformative breakthrough for Sarah Franken this is a historically relevant show. Albeit dark and twisted it is brilliantly witty and shouldn't be missed.  Difficult and awkward subject matter should be ridiculed in this way, it pushes it out into the sphere of conversation instead of rotting away with the skeletons in the closet.  Who Keeps Making all these People runs till the 30th of August.

            Sarah dedicated this show to everybody that stands up for and believes in free speech.

Daddy and Robin I Love You at the Fringe

Bob's Blundabus at Potterrow

Cammy and Robin

Daddy and Robin I Love You

(Featuring the Little Snowman)

10th August, 4.30

Bobs Blundabus, Potterrow Underpass, Venue 212

Pay-what -you-like (£5)

This was definitely a fine afternoon to be in Bobs Blundabus.  As soon as I got up the stairs the upper deck sparkled as the sun shone in over the leafy underpass and ignited the colour of the painted glass in this recently converted double decker.  Local legend Cammy Sinclair was

at the back of the bus which has been kitted out with rows of benches  that do a brilliant job of maximizing the space.  With about 15  adults and 4 children it is comfortable and cozy. He kicks this family show off with a song about a dog with its legs cut off, 'This songs for the adults, you wont understand it,' Cammy explains to a child in the front row and to be fair none of us do but that's the point, there's something VERY Ivor Cutler about it.    Behind the drum kit, up front, Cammy's son Robin is in charge of the good majority of the show.  Cammy constantly looking to him for direction, its very sweet.  Not at all like some of the scenarios you expect when parents get their children involved with performance.  They are playing, I've no doubt the in the same way they do at home so its almost like an insight into their eccentric and fascinating relationship instead of a strictly choreographed  show.  Although the lads only 3  he belts out a mean bit of controlled drumming which he has obviously been learning at home and I must say I'm impressed.  Cammy has been in many bands as the drummer over the years so I'm not surprised when this is the instrument of choice for his son.  Oh, and he is really good at timing a honk from his red nose too.  I'm most impressed by the fact that the wee man sits their for the whole show and you know he wants to be there.  Theres loads of audience participation, kids songs made daft enough so that the parents don't need to feel like its a week day in term time but enough like it to keep the kids engaged.  In another game an audience member is asked to participate as a victim while others pass round pre written heckcles.  It's chaotic but always fun  and culminates into some of the worst juggling I have ever seen!

This is a happy wee event in a great location,  Cammys surreal nonsesical humour is almost rationalised by his wee son and is well worth looking at. Daddy and Robin  can be seen again  today at four thirty and on the 27-29th of August.

Cammy and Robin (No Snowman)

Here be Lions!

A friend of mine recently shared an image on facebook.  It was her birthday so I thought I'd make her a digi card.  I noticed in the top right of the image she appeared in there was what appeared to be a lions head in a fock formation.  She was on Llangenith beach in South Wales at the time.  I used to live on the Gower but had never noticed it...it is a big beach!  This friend is a chiropterologist so I was pretty chuffed with what I discovered when I mucked about with the image in photoshop, it appeared to be two kissing bats.  She was with her boyfriend at the time, a lad I've known since 1997, and he had taken the picture.  I'm sure if it weren't for their punk credentials they'd have found that sweet.....blerrrrrrrrrg!!!! (Good luck spotting the lions!)

Slab Boys!xx

Lucille!.....Little Richard!xxxx      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=opTM1pH154Q
Watch Tutti Frutti for Free  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dxG47ZEtpg
Stanley Odd ...Oddessy....https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uLPR7POznw
OK i could have hyper linked but this is all I can do for you.
If you dont know how to cut and paste its time to learn!


Slab Boys is set in the Slab room of a paint mixing factory in Paisley in the late 1950's. There’s a massive poster of James Dean, painted by Byrne, centre stage on the door of a cupboard. This makes sure that we don't bother to confuse this and there's rock and roll being played in the theatre, I love Little Richard! On stage we can see that a staff party is arranged so obviously music and culture are going to be important here. I've come with my mum who's feet immediately start tapping away....perfect I'm thinking, something we can both appreciate. We are in the stalls so we can easily look up and see John Byrne's painting from where we are sitting. It's my first time down stairs in the Kings and interestingly there loads of school kids down here. I'm pretty chuffed as I'm sitting two seats behind Michael Palin, or a seat with his plaque on it at least! 


Two Glaswegians, one clearly a beatnik (complete with quiff) stride onto the stage, an amazingly high pitched weigie accent is squeezed from the nose of George 'Spanky' Farrel (Jamie Quinn). He is accompanied by Hector Mckenzie (Scott Fletcher) who don paint stained brown overalls in a particularly grimy looking work shop. The dialogue begins and it is evident from the beginning that this show is going to be back to back with one liners. All intensely colloquial...I love these and common language is a consistent issue with me and my mum so I'm glad its here. They are joined slightly later by the in house rebel without a cause Phil Mcann (Sammy Hayman), who' although bad is a lad with a heart of gold. His unfortunate background is disguised in humour. A brilliant way of talking about difficult social issues such as mental health. When this was written about and played originally you probably would people have laughed so easily at the misfortunes of a mentally ill woman throwing herself through a plate glass window and being abused by the health care system I ask myself? I mean if it wasn't in a historical context.


Class divide is put out there by the introduction of blazer wearing public school boy Alan Downie (Keiran Baker). Slab boys/working class versus public schools and desks. This is accentuated by go betweens, plooky fat man Jack Hogg (James Allenby-Kirk) and Lucielle Bentley (Keira Lucchesi). They straddle both the slab room and the higher positions in the factory. It's at this stage that I begin to lose track of who is of who isn’t in River City but my mum keeps me up dated. I'm struck particularly when I recognise, boss man Willie Curry (David Hayman). I say to myself.. 'Holy shit, it Sawney Bean disguised as Basil Fawlty!' The patoir between him and the boys is priceless with constant quips like 'this is a a rest home for retired beatniks, not a slab room' to which they consistently reply with unphased sarcastic retorts. The dialogue is sing songy or perhaps it would be better to parallel it with spoken word and almost reminds me of Scottish hip hop band Stanley Odd. It is accompanied by exaggerated almost dance like movement on the stage. The two beatniks appropriate a duet like stance in many situations. There are constant cultural references to do with fashion, class and religion. Some of them nearly deceased by today’s standards some still frighteningly relevant!
Behind us we had two Glaswegian ladies had cheered and shouted in all the wrong timings but they seemed closer to the reality of the play, one of them stated that her pop's always sent her to the bookies like Sadie (Kathryn Howden) the tea lady has to do for her half arsed husband. They clinked bottles around so was glad this time around that I'd not been out with my partner in crime or there would have been a right ruckas from our corner. It watches like an extended version of the young ones including guest appearances from Billy Bunter. All wickedly eccentric exaggerated characters. My older cousin was a massive fan of all the 80's BCC comedy stuff which he recorded on VHS so I've always known John Byrne’s Tutti Frutti and I can see now where it all started. I watched these all on a sunday afternoon after church. It didn’t make sense to me when I was a nipper like the young ones did in a slap stick way but Comic Strip giant Robbie Coltrane sucked me in even then! I might even go again! (rattles coppers jar)
My only complaint, hopefully wouldn't occur on a second visitation, for this show is the size of the coupon on that man two down from me. Mum said she would go again...with or with out the constant nose blowing, packet crinkling and beer swilling going on behind us, but that can be easily remedied by bringing my own cold, crisps and booze. While I was in the toilet at half time I overheard a conversation from some 16 year old girls who had come with their class. One of them stated, 'well it's better than I thought it would be'. If I was John Byrne I would take this as a massive compliment! Imagine...a child of the teenies even pretending to like some thing about the 50's made in the 70's. It's the equivalent , in my mind, of giving them a BBC computer and expecting them to know what to do with it!

Hairdressers Mural

I was asked to produce something to keep folks eyes busy while their hair is getting washed down the hairdressers....this is what I came up with for now.  I'm pretty certain this is probably more psychedelic than what they were after so shall endevour to tone it down a bit!